A man buys several sheep, hoping to
breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are
getting pregnant, and calls a veterinarian for help. The vet tells him that he
should try artificial insemination.
The guy doesn't have the slightest
idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the
vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they
will stop standing around and will instead lay down and wallow in the grass
when they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives it some
thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means HE has
to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the sheep into his truck, drives them out
into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes and looks out
at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that
the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again.
He drives them out to the woods,
bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed. The
next morning he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around.
One more try, he tells himself, and
proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day
shagging the sheep and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even
raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look out
and tell him if the sheep are laying in the grass.
"No," she says,
"they're all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn."
